Is it your surprise gift??

The film ‘Ki and Ka’ had a scene where Kareena’s character doubts that she is pregnant and picks up a fight with Arjun’s character – accusing him that pregnancy was the ultimate weapon he used to tame down her ambitions so that he could confine her to home and prove his masculinity. Though in the film it later turns out that she is not pregnant. But I saw the film, just after I was declared pregnant; and it affected me deeply!! Is that how I was supposed to think? Was it going to be the end of my career and my life? But when I thought it through… I had a very different realisation.

Me and my husband were not planning a baby when I got pregnant! In fact we had planned to not have kids for almost 3-4 years. There were more important things for both of us to do – book to finish, loans to pay off, savings to create and a future to secure – before we even thought of extending our family! And  then God announced his special plan. He tricked us!! I was the one who would track even a week’s delay in my periods to avoid any risks and start taking necessary medication. But this time around – before I could feel that I have missed my periods and I should take a pregnancy check – I spotted some bleeding – which I assumed was periods but was actually either implantation bleeding or a normal spotting that happens to some women during the first trimester! I got relaxed and my pregnancy got settled!! 

It was almost 4 weeks later, when I had fever and had to be hospitalised; did we realise that I was already 8 weeks pregnant. It was the most shocking news of my life!!!! What were we supposed to do?? The radiologist had made me hear the heart beats when we got our sonography done!! Now going for an abortion wouldn’t be as simple as popping some pill and not realising what I was doing. Now it would mean killing a life which had already begun to live… So we took the decision, anybody else in our place would have taken — we went ahead with the pregnancy. 

But very soon we realised it was our ‘surprise gift’!! Sooner or later – you always start enjoying your pregnancy. You may have had different plans for your life and career; and now you would have to modify them for the child. But in the end it will always be worth it. It will always bring more meaning to your life than the money in your bank or the promotions on your resume…

If I have to speak for myself – it is hardly two months since the news first broke out to us – and I already have chalked out a revised plan for my life. And have started feeling that this is the best time for me to be pregnant.  And trust me I have had to make major sacrifices – losing out on a lot of work opportunities.  The one to go to work almost every day of my life – was compelled to stay back at home. And this sabbatical would continue for almost a year now – At least till the baby is six months old. But somehow I am enjoying it now – all my pending work – I am finally able to complete. I got back to writing!! And have made a few other plans as well.

All in all, something or the other, always works out for you. So embrace the new change with a smile and things will always fall back in place. Though there will always be days that will be gloomy and will make you question your decision again. When you will feel that life might just become a bit too difficult – monies constrained! But just breathe and relax! Something or the other will always… Always work out!! So embrace your surprise gift… And celebrate!!

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