Pregnancy is a time when you are full of questions and an equal number of random answers are also floating around you – from all the other ladies in your family and beyond!! The real question amongst this is what to listen to and what to filter? And how on Earth are you supposed to know what exactly is right for you?
A simple answer is – listen to your body, your doctor, your mother and then no-one – And just in this order!
The closer you get to your delivery time, all these instructions and unsolicited advices are going to multiply. Listen to them all – then either laugh or think over it.
In this post, I am compiling a few of really weird questions that people have asked or the things that they do that can be really annoying at this stage.
1. Are your breasts leaking already? It means you are going to have an early labour!
– Yes, this is certainly a sign that your body is gearing up to deliver in sometime. But no certain sign that you are going to deliver soon. Some people have experienced these discharges from the first month of the pregnancy – then would they have delivered then or what?
2. If the baby is fully developed and healthy, take it out in advance na – why you want to bear for another month?
– What is this – some ice-cream forming inside you – that you start nibbling on it once it is ready? Relax! If it is some doctor telling you this nonsense – you need to rethink your decision about having this doctor! Everything has it’s right time.. If the child would have been ready, it would have come out on its own. Yes, unless there is some emergency or you are carrying multiple babies – don’t let anyone tell you when to take out the baby. Let Nature do its job!
3. Your bump has become so big and you still wear a seat belt?
– You better wear a seat belt while travelling. In a case of emergency braking, that belt will be your saviour! Position the belt rightly on your body if it is bothering you – though mostly it just shouldn’t bother!
4. So it’s a boy or a girl? Haven’t you seen it in your sonography yet? You can easily make out!
Yes, of course you can make out in the sonography (but only if you were a radiologist yourself). And I also believe that it is ok for you to know whether it is a boy or a girl. But if you haven’t checked yet, and want to unwrap that mystery only at birth – don’t let anyone make you feel you have been a less of a vigilant person during your sonography.. You were seeing the little one – all your love and concentration was on cherishing that moment – it is ok if you didn’t know in advance whether it is a boy or a girl.
5. When does your baby kick the most? Is it during the night? Then you are going to have a nightmare putting him or her to sleep once out!!
– The baby is supposed to kick 24X7.. And night is the time when you are doing nothing else – so you notice it more and more often. That is no way a connection that the baby, when out, is going to keep you up in the night. Yes, the baby is going to have some trouble initially, while establishing a sleeping pattern and will keep you up in the night – but that has no correlation with the kicking at night.
6. This one is probably not for everyone – but I was hit with it and it’s the most bizarre thing ever – Are you going to let your child also pursue a creative field like you and your husband? There is so much insecurity and hardships that you guys go through – will you let your child also go through it?
– I wanted to shout from the roof top – LET THE CHILD BREATHE IN THE OUTSIDE AIR FIRST!! And then decide what career to take and what not to take!
7. Why do you always feel tired? Aren’t you taking enough care of yourself?
– Boss!! There is someone inside of me – growing all the time. So technically, even if I am not doing anything else, I am at least turning food to human – that takes a lot of my energy. Hence, I am tired. Do you have a problem?
8. When will you resume back to work? And how will you manage with the baby?
– These are few things mothers themselves are battling within their heads to find just the ‘right’ solution for them. And there is no general formula to get this right. People have different priorities in life and they lead to them taking a few decisions that only they understand. You don’t need to answer this to anyone. When you will cross that bridge, people will see how you did it. No one will understand your perspective better than you. So don’t waste your energy explaining.
9. Worst of all will be all those random observations on your body changes:
– Oh! Your breasts have grown quite large!
– Oh! Your breasts haven’t grown so large – have you checked with the doctor?
– Oh! Your tummy is not showing so much – the baby is developing na properly?
– Oh! Your tummy is showing too much – that won’t be a problem na?
– Oh! Why is your back also growing along – it will be difficult to shed that weight?
– Oh! Your tummy is growing low!
– Oh! Your tummy is growing quite in your face!
– You are glowing! Baby boy it is!!
– What happened to you? Your daughter seems to have stolen all your beauty!
10. And then will be those unsolicited touches – some of you may not mind at all – but some of us will find it very irritating – almost like prying in my personal space:
Why the hell should you touch my tummy to ask me how am I feeling? I may not like those foreign touches on my body at this time! So give me that much space na.