As I lay there, on the operation theatre bed – my eyes covered, hands tied, body numbed by anesthesia – my heart was still beating, in fact much faster. It was one of the most overwhelming moments of my life – waiting on the bed to be operated for my C-section delivery after having spent the entire day, going through labour pain with the hope to deliver naturally. Everyone around me in the room was on panic mode, because they were also gearing up for a normal delivery (as that was the sure sign that my body was giving). But when they broke the water, they realised that the baby had pooped inside and now they couldn’t have taken the risk – needed to operate right then!
AND THEN… before I even realised, while I was still contemplating what was going to happen – IT JUST HAPPENED! The doctor made the slit, pulled him out, slapped his but (I still can hear that sound while I type this) and he cried his first breath! F………………..K! I can’t explain in words what I felt at that moment. It was ecstatic! For once I understood what it really meant to be ecstatic! Tears rolled down my cheeks and my lips were quivering. The world had come alive in a very different way. I had anticipated the pain the delivery would cause, but I had never anticipated this feeling of pure bliss that I experienced in the very moment, when my life changed forever! I didn’t know I would get so emotional at that point. I thought I was a strong person who was prepared to take on life. Yes, that I was – but this was not a moment about ‘strength’ it was a moment about touching the innermost layer of your emotions. You seldom go that deep inside. I think I will never experience the same feeling ever again. Not with my second child even!
I am taking part in The Write Tribe Problogger October 2017 Blogging Challenge! And today’s prompt was ‘NOSTALGIA’. And can you beat it – today is my son’s first birthday! I am anyways floating in the ‘Nostalgia Cloud’ – replaying the moment of his birth, again and again in my head.
How time flew! Just can’t believe that my little boy, Yuddhweer – is already one year old! Do I feel older? No! I just feel so much more in love with him and life in general. There is so much happiness that a child can bring to your life that there is no equivalent to it.